Hastening The Work: A Member's Story

Guess who are the investigators?

For decades, many members of The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints have heard the familiar cry of David O. Mckay stating that every member a missionary. Even till today, this phrase has continually shown up in numerous talks and General Conferences.

Like I mentioned in my previous post, the lowered missionary age requirement highlighted, among other hot topics, this theme which we now call "hastening the work". It's no novel concept, but there seems to be a heightened sense of urgency.

I don't remember where I read this, but I recall at some point Neal A. Maxwell mentioned that it is us that's holding back the Second Coming of Christ by not properly prepare the way of The Lord in His earthly kingdom. This goes back to the mission statement of the Church: to invite all to come unto Christ (D&C 20:59). Naturally, this encompasses preaching the Gospel, perfecting the saints, and redeeming the dead.

Focusing on the members' side of things, I'm sure most of us have been constantly reminded of duties like home teaching, temple ordinances, etc. They'll be topics for another time. Although it's been nearly four years since I've been off my mission, I've observed how members can shape and influence missionary work. This will be a "how I should respond when I see this" column. I'll describe a scenario and then write down potential actions to resolve the said situation.

Scenario: hard working missionaries not being productive
Potential Actions:

• Offer missionaries advice - not condescendingly, not without some tack and conversation skills. I have served a mission. I'm sure I have some decent ideas (like those missionaries that did the chalk drawings in New York) if the current proselyting methods aren't bringing forth fruit.
• Referrals - this has to be done over time (or get lucky). I don't want to shove a friend into the missionaries out of nowhere. There's a reason why we don't put our candles under a bushel. I should be an example to my friends and neighbors (Matt 5:15).

Scenario: recent converts go inactive
Actions:

• Look inwardly - ask myself, "did I fellowship or were at least friendly to the new convert during the whole investigatory process?" It baffles me when members make unfair remarks against these people. To be frank, it's attacking the recent covert's integrity, making implications about the missionaries, ward mission leader, and even the bishop/branch president. Be a helping hand in the process, not rain in a parade.
• See it as opportunity - many people think preaching the Gospel is purely accomplished by full-time missionaries and home teaching/visiting teaching is the member version of this work. Well, in this case, it can go beyond them. Keeping up with my Book of Mormon readings (or just the baptismal covenant), we soon realize we all put our shoulders to the wheel (Mosiah 18:8-10). Now, it's up to the members to do the rescue.

Scenario: hungry missionaries

Actions:

• A snack - no need to feed them a meal when it's not feasible. Never hurts to buy them a drink or a snack, though. Not all missionaries go hungry, in fact, some gain weight and there are places where members love stuffing them. For me, I was a measly 120 pounds on my mission...I'm 150 now and I don't know where I can lose that 30 pounds.
• Coupons - that I never seem to use. Missionaries already have little money. If possible, I'm down with offering minimal assistance in this matter.
• Money - a shout out to the Plymouth Ward when the Relief Society came up with the idea to give the four missionaries some spending money. It was a gesture that prolonged my lifespan by a wide margin, in addition to the Hazells' generosity. Point being, this is something I don't have to do alone.

When Jesus told the Apostles to go forth without scrip, etc., the verses were then followed by abiding in the dwellings of those who would or have received the good news (various places in the Four Gospels). Definitely not manna falling from the sky. So, little temporal assistance is always appreciated and needed.

Scenario: proselyte with missionaries

Actions:

• Remember who I am - nobody likes a pushy weirdo without a tag. I would let the missionaries lead the approach and offer my bit of assistance. I've served a mission, I can do this. Although, I do wonder when will be the next time I'll have free time to do this again once I graduate. Probably not until retirement.
• Be firm - and not overbearing (Alma 38:12). This goes back to the pushy weirdo with no name tag above. It is common courtesy. It somewhat irked me during an instance when a member who was supposed to help alongside of us became mere nuisance and hindrance. Not to mention, aggravating random strangers on the road is usually not the best idea.

The list would extend indefinitely if I sit here typing all night. Whenever I see something happening, I tend to wonder if I could, or would, do something different. The above-mentioned scenarios are a few things I've put some thought into, but haven't necessarily put into actions as of yet. Regardless, setting goals is a way I can progress because I have a direction to march towards.

Motherhood Is Not Overrated

It's funny because everyone has to learn and/or improvise.

It's been a year since the mission age requirement for both young men and women was lowered. With the lowering of age and increased prominence of sister missionaries worldwide, there have been some interesting social movements around as well. In particular, I've noticed some more Mormon feminist activities.

I'm all for equal opportunities and equality regardless of gender, race, etc. However, I could never align myself 100% with that ideology.

Of course, feminism is defined as collection of movements and ideologies aimed to define, establishing, defending equal political, economical, and social rights for women. Sounds awesome, right? Well, just like any other ideology practiced by people, sometimes they go the extreme or beyond the purpose of what it should have been in the first place. Believe me, everything sounds good on paper, but not so much in practice. I'm sure many of you can think of feminist supporters who hold the idea that women are superior and that we should reverse the discrimination in the other direction instead.

This past Conference, I noted the talks by D. Todd Christofferson and Neil L. Andersen. They were about women's roles and the influence they have on society as a whole. I believe those talks were sparked by the most recent demands on ordination of women. What does this has to do with the title of the post? I will get to that in a moment. I've thought about this topic before the October Conference, and I was glad the issue was addressed.

Motherhood and the nurturing of children have been mainstays of human interactions for women probably since the dawn of time. While men could also take roles in such bonding, I guess it's just different due to myriads of factors I'm not going to list here. Basically, mothers tend to spend more time with children ; thus, socialization of children happens at home and especially by the mothers.

Unfortunately, as sexist notions rose among the population, the domestic duties performed by women were ridiculed and portrayed in negative light by (mostly) men. Then, centuries of oppression continued until educated minds came to their senses and felt degrading half of the human population was definitely not the best way to build a society.

An even more unfortunate turn of events is the notion that what women do in the home is practically meaningless. The idea that domestic chores, nurturing children, being a support character in the family, etc. are but shackles to a woman's potential. In a sense, they are partially correct. When a woman is only offered these choices, it is undoubtedly limiting. I believe a woman should be able to choose to have a career and/or focus on family life. Agency and opportunity should have been the main focus of the feminist movement.

Hilariously, much of the feminist movement focuses on what men arbitrarily labeled as insignificant when it comes to a woman's important role in the family. The sense that women should stay away from family pursuits, women should be like men and do everything like men or better.

Who suffer in the end? The next generation. The paradox here is almost everyone still expects men to go out and have a career while the new women are often encouraged to stay away from home life or even take on both roles as breadwinner and a mother. I have to admit, it is very difficult to sustain a family based on a single income in today's economy, but many proponents of the breadwinner mother seem to prefer the idea the mother takes all the responsibilities on herself. She doesn't need a man. She can do just as well.

Well, how about that? A woman doesn't need a man for anything because she can do it herself. Guess who's liberated in the end? Men. (It totally made my day when Elder Christofferson brought that up.) The irony, then, is we are fighting for equality not based on revealed principles, but what the ever-shifting world has to say about importance, which often fortifies itself behind materialism and the currently not-so-hot economy.

In one of Paul's letters, he taught neither is the man without the woman, neither the woman without the man, in the Lord (1 Cor. 11:11). No one achieves exaltation alone. Eve was to be a help meet to Adam. In fact, we learn that Eve labored with Adam to bring about the human family (Gen. 2:18; Moses 5:1). The point being, they worked together. While it's been speculated that Adam performed more of a provider role and Eve in nurturing children, but I'm sure it was not 100% one way or the other. Most happily married couples I know have overlapping duties while one partner focused more in one responsibility than the other.

Satan is clever. By driving men and women apart, he effectively drives families apart and frustrates the progression of many. Yes, he wouldn't win in the long run, but the point is to make as many people to fall short of celestial glory as possible because he wants them to be as miserable as himself (2 Ne. 2:18).

So, to give you my opinion on ordination of women... I believe when the time is right, the Lord will reveal what He will. We are taught in the temple that the wife is the priestess unto the husband. I'm sure there's some profound meaning behind that phrase. Regardless, the phrase also suggests it's different from the priesthood men hold to bless others. I don't know what the implication is because I'm only a mortal, but I do know that both genders are different by nature.

Everyone is NOT the same. If we were, most of us would have gladly followed Lucifer in the rebellion instead of going along with the Father's original plan. Life is about choices and everyone, men and women, are entitled to pursue what they want in this journey. However, don't ever underestimate the importance of the role of mother in a family. Trust me, if my mom didn't raise me a certain way, I wouldn't be the way I am today. Just because it's not your cup of tea doesn't mean it's not important. Your own personal Zion is not exactly the same as everyone else's.

Doubt Your Doubts

The 183rd Semiannual General Conference

It's that time again! Every six months, The Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-day Saints opens up its global broadcasting capability for General Conference, a time when members all over the world gather and listen to inspired messages.

Thanks to the convenience of the Internet, I was able to stay at home and enjoy the experience with my roommates.

Anyways, it looks like I'll probably be spending this month writing about topics that impressed me the most during Conference.

I've always enjoyed Dieter F. Uchtdorf's talk since the day I discovered his awesome German accent and intriguingly good looking hair for his age. The message he delivered is best quoted as "doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith". I chose to write about this message first because it resonates deeply with where I came from in life as a convert to the Church.

President Uchtdorf counselled members to hold steadfast to the words of eternal life because we are part of the restored church of Jesus Christ. There are many people who have left due to struggles with challenges or even unkind behaviors from its members. However complicated the reasons are for leaving, he urged us to stay and consecrate our talents for the greater good of the Kingdom of God on Earth.

When Jesus said that no man could come unto Him except it were given of him by the Father, many disciples walked with him no more because they believed not in His teachings. Jesus turned to the Twelve and asked if they would also go away. To which, Peter answered, "Lord, to whom shall we go? Thou hast the words of eternal life" (John 6:65-67). Peter knew He was the Messiah.

But, we can't compare mortals to The Master. Yes, people are imperfect and operations under human hands also are imperfect. This is more the reason why we should all consecrate our efforts to make sure the establishment functions the way as it is intended. Like Peter mentioned, if we have, or had, the conviction to believe this is the true church of Christ restored upon the Earth in the latter days, where else would we go to hold steadfast and endure to the end?

Echoing from my previous post, are we overconfident to the point that we believe we can make it on our own by our own self-proclaimed proficiency in following the Spirit? The Lord gave people weaknesses so they can be humble, and in meekness, they are made strong (Ether 12:27). It is said that no man is an island, and I believe there's wisdom in that saying. We easily wind up relying on the arm of the flesh when we go solo, not to mention that we'd most likely stop loving our neighbors altogether.

I could have turned my back on so many occasions due to trials or certain "unfairness" in life that caught up with me. To this day, I still stand by my mantra that I am ultimately accountable for my own actions. I sure did not join the Church because of social comfort, special privileges, or some cute girl that happened to be Mormon. My loyalty and faith lie with God and it was restored when I was introduced to His restored teachings. I will be part of His organization and contribute to the cause.

As a man of minority myself, I've had plenty of people dislike me simply because of the color of my skin and physical appearance. It's of no matter because I know there are good and bad in every groups of people. As for challenging the legitimacy or capability of leaders, my take has always been should they be wrong, Jesus Himself will deal with them when He returns. It is of no concern to me.

Some people would point out some of the "blatantly wrong" things that happen/happened in the Church. To them, I'll respond with what the Lord has spoken many times in the Doctrine and Covenants. It is the eleventh hour and we've been called to labor in the vineyard one last time before the great harvest. I am certain the Church will not go astray to the point of leading men into mass apostasy before the Savior returns. Remember, doubt your doubts before you doubt your faith!

Overconfidence

A couple of Sundays ago, our Elder's Quorum President, Brenton, gave a talk about being lax and too comfortable as Saints as time passes. The topic is more than relevant in a YSA setting.

Typically, once you have become familiar with a routine, you naturally become less invested emotionally. When put that in a gospel perspective, it signifies an underlying danger that's waiting to happen.

The allegory Brenton gave during his talk was mountain biking. I'm sure that applies to all extreme sports. When a novice is just starting out, the said person is unlikely to perform reckless actions due to the lack of experience. However, over time, that gradually changes as the novice improves and becomes a veteran in the game. Brenton used his close to death experience to relate to a lax attitude in the journey of discipleship. He almost rammed into a tree because he was so confident that he could handle the trail by himself. Little did he know, there were things that he could not control and it resulted in a near fatal experience.

We often hear in sacrament, Sunday schools, and even our respective groups, etc. that we should pray always and read the scriptures daily. These are even commandments from the Lord Himself. As time passes and we hear the same message again and again, we became complacent, thinking that we've already got all the basics covered. In reality, we are slowly slipping away when we put more and more "I know" before "I do". It's great to have the knowledge about the gospel, but it is more important to live it.

I remember the zeal I had when I was first baptized. Over the years, I admit that I don't have the same fiery desire to always check on myself to make sure I'm doing all the basics that every member has been asked to do. That doesn't mean I'm a horrible person, but that certainly indicates I'm not doing as well as I should be. The point being, we don't want to be in a state of carnal security (2 Nephi 28:21). You see it happen in the Church quite often. This can range from that married couple who thinks their temple sealing is the end all be all of progression to some people who says they believe, but feel like it's okay to let off a little slack because they've been following the commandments for so long.

That is the wrong attitude. I find myself trying to pray earnestly and read my scriptures daily, but the limited amount of time on my hands often pushes me otherwise. Regardless, we aren't expected to run faster than we have strength (D&C 10:4). I suppose we have the tendency to either do too little or do too much at a given time. Perhaps baby steps, though as embarrassing as it is in YOUR own mind, are the best place to start.

Nobody should be judging you for the choices you make to progress towards a better you. I'll take my time and do the best I can. Remember, perfection is not the requirement in this lifetime, but it certainly feels great to know where your limit lies and push beyond it.

Lessons From Roommates: Conflicts

Looks familiar?

I'm sure y'all enjoyed last week's entry because it was the most popular and perhaps the happiest one I've ever written. Hate to disappoint you folks, but this week's topic is not as auspicious. In fact, it is the exact opposite.

I felt it was appropriate to write about this topic while we blow over the last BYU vs. Utah game for several years and listening to my 50's-60's music playlist.

I'm going to talk about a common occurrence with the people you live with: conflict. The following event happened a couple of weeks ago. I've described myself as the "angry uncle" of the house before. However, this is probably the first time I went all-out yelling at a housemate because I was sick and tired of his messiness and inconsideration. Just a spoiler, we did resolve this peacefully and everything has been running smoothly, with a few minor kinks here and there, since the confrontation.

A quick background: I'm in the MLS program here at BYU, so I'm rather busy most of the times. (Ironically, I actually sleep more than I did in previous semesters and even this past summer break.) One night, I wanted to cook some dinner and take a break from studying. Like usual, the sink had a variety of used utensils in it. I haven't complained too much about doing the dishes since I'm the person who's usually home upstairs. My two other roommates (there are actually six of us; three downstairs and three up) usually help along if I ask them too.

That very night, I planned on washing a few of those dishes and move on to dinner. Suddenly, I realized the water was filling up. We don't have a garbage disposal for our sink, so filling up was always a bad sign. I quickly moved some of the dirty stuff aside and tried to figure out what was obstructing the drain. When I did, I found...POTATO PEELS. Loads of them. Naturally, due to stress and somewhat lack of sleep, I flipped out and spent the next half an hour trying to clear the drain. I had a clear idea who was the culprit.

When the said culprit returned home, I went into rage mode. I will spare you the details of the horrible things I've said. We are guys and close friends for the most part; this tactic is not recommended for the roommate you barely know or if you are a woman with female roommates. The gist of my angry outburst was how I didn't mind washing the dishes, but I get pissed off when things get complicated because I don't have very much free time to deal with shenanigans. After insulting (truthfully) and point out every single ridiculousness he's pulled around the house plus threats of physical violence, I let him know that I was only angry because I cared and most people wouldn't bother confronting him and would simply consider him a slob or a prick in the long run.

Of course, I did apologize to him later on. I related the incident with some of my other roommates. My (second) cousin pointed out that the culprit would eventually learn since he's 22, to which I dismissed as bull crap. The Voice of Reason, however, told me how I always occupied the living room upstairs with my stuff.

To understand that comment, you would have to understand about Miller, where we lived last year. Yes, the dreaded Miller Apartments. The apartment space there were so small (for six people) that if my cousin was in the room we shared, I would essentially have no room for myself. That was not a fat joke. There was simply not enough room to maneuver unless I wanted to sit on my bed and do my homework, etc. That, has never been efficient for me.

Anyways, it would appear that I didn't break the habit when we moved into the more spacious "Pinecone". When I first heard it from that roommate, I immediately retorted with nobody in the house ever told me about it (the truth was, they probably did at some point, but I spaced). He responded he didn't want to start an  argument with me too.

I realized then, that there are many times in our lives we don't get approached or approaching others about their "annoying" behaviors. We allow a person to continue his/her little menacing with no apprehension. The result? The said person is hated by more people in the future due to the same thing. While I don't recommend going around to strangers and voice your opinions about their behaviors all the time, I do believe this apply to people we know very well.

How is this relevant? Parents these days often do this. They don't tell their children no. I'm not talking about the right and wrong. I'm talking about certain social and courtesy cues. A blog post I've read a while back touched base with similar situations where ignorance gave off the illusion that an entire city was being mean and rude to you when it's really you that's the problem. Remember the NYC stereotype? Perhaps you should read about it here.

What did I learn from this episode? Having close friends as roommates is the perfect time to find character flaws and improve. Whether it's you or your roommates, having the experience definitely allows you to take a closer examination at your own selves. For me, little realizations like this could help me with future roommate situations when I graduate and maybe even marriage.

Don't be afraid to speak out to those you are close to or love. It'll save you a lot of awkward or heated confrontations with someone else (or the above mentioned persons) later. Sometimes, it's not easy to see what you are doing is actually bothering people.

It's a Magical Week!

Ammon and Julie are now engaged!

Well, maybe not so much for me than for my wonderful roommate, Ammon. On Sept. 12, 2013, he officially proposed to the one and only Julie. We are happy for them and hope to put out more stories of them for their wedding in December.

You may be thinking: what does this has to do with me and the price of oil in the Middle East? I generally don't outline something unless it has some significance in my journey of progression. I'm not trying to be boastful or anything, but I am glad to have had a hand in this turn out, along with my other roommates and others who might have contributed to this great occasion (aside from the main protagonists in the pictures, obviously).

I won't go over the details of my conversations with Ammon before his commitment towards the wonderful lady to the left, but the gist of it goes like this:

Marriage is hard work. We can spend our whole life looking for that "perfect" person, but perfection simply does not exist (or maybe some people are that lucky and I've never heard of them). It's always going to involve work. The real question, then, is not so much about who you marry, but how much effort you are willing to put forth into the relationship to make it work. Don't get me wrong, the type of person you choose still do matter because that can either increase your workload or ease it. You marry who you think is the "perfect" companion; there's work. You marry someone who has nothing but mutual attraction for you; there's work, except there's going to be tons more of it to make it a happy marriage. This is the principle.

With that principle in mind...

When good ol' Spencer W. Kimball said that everyone can marry anyone and produce a happy marriage, he wasn't kidding. He didn't mean two persons come together and keep doing the same things they did when they were single. There are very few people, if any, that can walk into a marriage without changing their habits, problems, etc.

Perhaps one of the greatest issue with marriage today is the fact that more people are becoming selfish. More and more people want to stay the way they are and expect the other person to accommodate their lifestyles. Or, there's a bump in the road; a challenge and they simply give up. That simply won't work. Maybe you should ask the people in stable marriages about how they kept theirs working. Divorce is never the answer unless abuse and life-threatening situations are involved. Personally, I think I've picked up a few tips for the time I'm at that stage of life.

You've gained Karma!

It's ironic that I'm talking about marriage when I'm single and not dating anyone (for the moment). Regardless, through this little episode, I've gained karma!

The First Week: A Quick Rerview

The campus is alive again!

A series events led to a rather inspirational realization this week, but since it's the start of the school year, I felt it's probably better to give a brief synopsis of my semester. This way, you'll have a better perspective to the things I will write about for the rest of the school year.

Due to my insane schedule in the last year of the medical laboratory science program, I'm limiting myself to four to eight posts per month. However, this past summer, I've made a goal to write meaningful posts instead of mere summaries all the time, so I won't necessarily meet the minimum four posts each month.

I have two exams each week! This may sound ridiculous, but it's TRUE! I knew what I was getting into when I signed up for my major. In addition to that, I'm in class from 08:00 to 18:00 Monday through Thursday with anywhere from two to three hours of break in between. I'll spend at least three hours each day in the labs. Fortunately, I like all my courses. It is just daunting to remember all the facts for each week's examinations. Perhaps the only saving grace is that the things I'm learning are not super difficult concepts.

As much as my department discourages me working 17 hours a week, I have no choice if I were to support myself. I would rather not be in the red for the next four months. At least I got a raise again, so that should supplement some of the expenses for the next few months until the Holidays hit.

Provo Temple

I finished this week with a rare excursion to the temple. My roommates and I figured that we won't be able to attend the temple regularly when we saw our schedules. It was a soothing experience for me. Of course, the decision to go to the temple was met with some interesting confrontations the night before on Thursday. Luckily, my roommates and I turned a negative experience into a constructive one. I'll elaborate on it in the next entry, hopefully.

When I came out from the temple, I beheld the Utah Lake. I've forgotten how beautiful the lake looks when sunlight is shining through the clouds, creating rays piercing through the sky. A side note, the Utah Lake itself is actually quite dirty, but this just shows how participating in temple activities can shift your perception more positively.

For a first week of school, it was packed. I feel as if I'm behind already. Nevertheless, I know I can get through it. The long soul-searching I've done throughout the summer and the spiritual example of a great friend on her mission has changed my own perspective for the better. I believe it has been a progressive year so far.